I'm more on top of things tonight, or at least not falling asleep, so we get this episode on time! As we left last time, Michelle was commenting on being the last woman standing, and that's how we begin this episode. Honey, if you can't do better than last week, you won't be standing much longer once Dom and Alex fall.
Giada starts by asking the contestants what they like for breakfast/brunch. I'm sure there are men watching all across the country who would kill to have Giada asking what they want for breakfast! Unfortunately for them, it's just a precursor to the challenge, where they have to make breakfast in 20 minutes that can be taken to go, so no utensils. Cut out to Brian Boitano saying, "I get it, I'm a busy soccer mom..." Is that your persona? I guess there are people who may like that, but I don't usually think of a soccer mom look when I think of a drag queen. Granted, I can't say I've been to many drag shows lately (okay, ever), so there's a lot I don't know about drag queens, but still.
This challenge does at least play to Alex's strengths, but we'll see what the others do. Football Eddie is crusting a steak in uncooked grits. We'll see how that works. I don't usually just pick up a steak and eat it unless I'm at Renn Fest. Lenny Jr. puts his andouille hash into a taco shell, Brian Boitano turns his hash into a wrap filling and Michelle makes her quiches mini so they can be hand held. Dom wants us to eat a poached egg in the car, because everyone wants to go into an important meeting at work with egg yolk streaking their shirt. He tells Bobby to poke it first, which sounds more like what he'd like to do to Giada.
Brian Boitano starts his presentation by saying he cooks with a lot of boys who love bacon. That's just too easy. He also says the ladies love it, which I didn't know he cared about. Mama Michelle starts thinking about her kids and gets sidetracked enough to start babbling. To hear her talk, she picks her kids up from school on Sundays and then sips mimosas with them. To top off her stellar performance, she forgot to salt her quiches. So your food was as bland as your presentation last week. Not a winning strategy. Good thing you already got to be the last girl, because that seems to be the last thing you'll be known for. Sandwich King made a sandwich that you can't pick up and eat and made chipped beef with fresh chorizo that Giada compares to baby food. Hmmmmm, maybe I should start making Patrick some baby food with chorizo! His presentation is heartfelt, but that won't save him for long. Eddie Football scores big with his presentation but fumbles his food as the grits get lost. Lenny's tacos earn him the win and the as-yet-unnamed advantage in the next challenge.
Richard Blais comes in to introduce a food truck throwdown, and Dom knows he's come home. The contestants are divided into three teams and Lenny gets to choose the theme for each team between burgers, tacos, and grilled cheese. They also get to create a side dish. Oh, and they get to make a video to draw people in. Do we get to see Lenny Jr. as a monster like Lenny Sr.? Dom says he does social media all the time to advertise his food truck. How does he manage the spotlight for that?? Brian Boitano and Lenny have burgers, Alex and Dom have tacos, and Eddie and Michelle have grilled cheese. Brian Boitano and Lenny decide to call theirs Asian Cajun Burger Boys. Stick it between the buns? Alex wants to get into some slapstick comedy with their video and truck name. We might as well just ask right now which one of them is going home.
Brian Boitano and Lenny Jr. are making their video, and Brian Boitano says they are alike because they both like meat and buns. Then Lenny is gesturing about how big he can take it and saying he's going to bring that Cajun flavor between his buns. Burns going in, burns coming out? Brian Boitano said he wants to eat Lenny's. Does he just see a bear? Good thing they have two more takes! Or is it? The second take is flubbed badly. We don't see the third take, so I guess that's the one they use in the end.
Eddie and Michelle start their first take with Michelle doing her version of the White Man's Overbite while Eddie looks on in the horror of a man who looks like he has some rhythm. Michelle keeps dancing in the second take while also saying "cheesy weesy," which sounds like she either needs an inhaler or has her kids on the mind again. We don't see their third take either.
Alex and Dom have three takes to slap each other and eat a tortilla-wrapped jalapeno. Again, burns going in, burns coming out? I don't want to be standing behind them in an hour!
While they're cooking, Michelle is distracted by her kids again. Lenny is worried about the time to cook that many burgers. Well, he was warned. Brian Boitano is making his buns out of ramen noodles, and they have to sit for 20 minutes before they can be grilled. I'm just waiting for them to lose customers to people with shorter lines.
We see the videos now, and the Burger Boys took the sex out of their video. Michelle keeps dancing through take three and ends with a move that makes you think she's waving a thong around her hand. The judges say her soup needs to kick butt in order to not boring. The Slapstick Boys actually did end up with a video that had Giada and Bobby cracking up enough to make Giada lean forward and show even more cleavage...they might be the winners on the video side after all.
Customers! The Burger Boys have a crowd and no burgers lined up. Unfortunately for Eddie and Michelle, her soup is awful. Dom and Alex are looking safer and safer all the time. Or they were. By the time the judges get there they have no customers and Alex's sausage taco is all burnt. Brian Boitano's ramen noodle bun is a surprise hit, and Richard Blais thinks the burger customers will be the most satisfied despite the wait.
During judgment, Michelle tells the judges that her mind is with her kids. Giada replies that she's a mom too and that it's hard, but that they only want people who really want to be in it. She adds that some people don't realize how hard it is until they're in there doing it. Amy from Season 3, anyone?
The Burger Boys pulled out the win despite the wait. They are the only ones safe, as Giada points out that at this point there are only winners and losers. Alex and Michelle are at the most risk, but I think Michelle will go home. Giada is poised to send Alex home until Michelle interrupts her and quits. Giada gives her a yes/no/cancel, but she goes through with it. And she was so proud to be the last woman standing. As Mike says, she's been in over her head for weeks, but still. Giada and Bobby talk about it and decide to let Alex stay. Eddie Football is competitive enough to not want an asterisk on his win. He needs to bring the flavor from here on out if he wants that to even be a consideration. So Dom and Alex are safe for another week, Alex by the skin of his teeth.
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